Mr. Frederick Lamingo
Director of Flamingo Immigration
4th March 2018
Thank you for your application to become a flamingo citizen of Kenya. Unfortunately I must advise you that at this point in time, your application has been unsuccessful for numerous reasons.
1. Your legs are particularly small, indicating that you have an approximate height of 12.6cm. The average height of a flamingo is 1.25m; you are therefore nowhere near the required threshold. As you do not currently have tall, slim legs, here are a few suggestions:
2. Your feathers are a dull shade of grey, whereas the flamingo’s plumage is an electric burst of bright pink. For those without pink feathers, we recommend the following advice:
3. Your enclosed photo clearly shows you standing on two legs. As you should already know, flamingos pose on one leg to conserve energy. Therefore you would certainly stand out in a crowd, however it would be for all the wrong reasons. This is definitely not something that we flamingos encourage.
If you are unable to stand on one leg, try practising for at least one hour a day. To guarantee success, follow this regime for a minimum of five weeks. If all else fails and you are truly a flamingo fan, arrange an appointment with Dr Woodpecker to have a leg cut off. His nurses will treat you like royalty and ensure you feel no pain at all.
I hope you have read this letter carefully. I look forward to receiving your improved application in the future.
Mr. Frederick Lamingo
Director of Flamingo Immigration (Kenya)
Pupils were invited to consider a character in one of the short-listed titles and were encouraged write a letter to that character offering some advice at a key point in the plot.
E.g. Advising George, what next to do with his medicine in ‘George’s Marvellous Medicine’
Helping Harry to cope with Professor Snape’s apparent favouritism in ‘Harry Potter’
Persuading Peter, not to go with the White Queen in ‘The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe”
Letters were written according to basic letter writing rules. Guidelines can be found at:
The Judging Panel included teachers and literacy specialists who considered the following when making their final decision: